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14-MAY-2025 | Honey Copy’s Intro Copy

Author

Dan Bogachek
May 14, 2025

You glance at your watch.

It’s 6:28. You’ve been at it since 3.
Crap. Your hot date is at 7. Running late. Sink shower it is.
Nowhere close to done editing…

“…at least all the ideas are laid out, so there’s that. Did I miss anything? I don’t think so? Ok, but how do I make it flow? I need to get the final draft to Stacey for design asap, team cutoff is at noon Thursday…”

You’ve spent dinner completely distracted. Your date just took off. You go home exhausted, plod to your desk, and flip open the laptop.

Or… what if:

5:41 — you’re out of the shower and lip-syncing.
6:17 — dressed to the nines and zenned out.
7:03 — the sunset glints off your aviators as you smile hello.
8:36 — it actually feels like you’re hitting it off. Not just hot, funny to boot.
Next morning, 9:27 — final draft ready in your inbox.
10:31 — Stacey messages back, “thanks, looks good!”

The difference?

Copygloss handled it. Before you left for the date, actually.

For help with editing, email Dan:
[email protected].

Honey Copy’s Intro Copy

True fucking story.

Seven years ago, a Belarusian angel investor — rumored to be in cahoots with the last dictator of Europe — asked my twenty-two-year-old self to fly out to Minsk, Belarus and sling some ink for the startups in his portfolio.

At the time, I didn’t know what the hell I was doing.

But, I played my best Don Draper, wrote some damn good copy and three weeks later cashed the biggest check I had ever seen in my life.

I’ve been writing advertising ever since.

To date, I’ve penned words that have sold $150 cookies, plant-based burgers, overpriced sneakers, stationary bikes, sweatpants that look like jeans, emeralds, flavored lubricants, psilocybin-infused chocolate, software (lots of fucking software), Swiss Gin, Kentucky Bourbon and Southern California Wine.

God-speed,

Cole Schafer
Founder of Honey Copy 🏁

Cole Schafer’s writing is brash & playful.

It sounds like someone. Not “It sounds like someone specific wrote it.” What I’m saying is the writing itself actually has a voice, you can practically hear it.

And you don’t need to fuckin’ cuss. (Don’t use it as a crutch.)

But — if that corner of the palette lets you express yourself more precisely? Well, don’t shy away, either. Be real and commit.